Saturday, January 15, 2011

Most Wanted List

jbignes5
This unlicensed troll suffered a traumatic brain injury and was in a coma for two years. When he awoke, he claimed to know what energy and electricity are and reinvented himself as reverend dumb fuck. Shouldn't take long to bring this one in. He is easily identifiable by the 68 nail gun scars on his forehead that caused the brain injury.

Pirate8179
This mouth breather is without a doubt the dumbest, most corrupt lying cheating prick that ever lived. He deletes anything that is helpful toward a real free energy device, gets people banned, changes posts. This scumbag has been busted doing it all and Hartman is "behind him" all the way. Maybe he should change his name to "Ass Pirate".


exnihiloest
He is to happy what black holes are to space.

Freq_Band
Freq_band was born a dwarf. His true life story was the inspiration behind the movie Austin Powers and Dr. Evil. In early 2011 Freq_Band went on a one man crusade against the human right to breath clean air and drink clean water. He was recently spotted in front of the UN holding a banner that said "Kill everyone but me and Dr. Evil".

Freq_Band is currently wanted by The American Troll Society on charges of  "Chemtrail Denial" and for inferring Hartman is a conspiracy nut.


Conspiracy nuts are people that are hyper think-y. Hartman does not match this profile. The ingredients in chemtrails are designed to make sure you don't get hyper think-y and notice the world is run by Mike Myers and his little minions.

Ramset THE DAMMED!
This shape shifting weasel who we are pretty sure is actually a totally hot Jewish babe in real life has recently attacked Quarktoo and switched sides. Perhaps grammatically cross dressing all day has confused him/her.

Ramset lobbied Hartman to get Grumpy unbanned before Quarktoo could get his coup 'O' stars from Grumpy / Sigma16's head. This is not only treason, this is blasphemy!

Ramset will remain suspended even once he has restored the gold star that he stole from TheBuzz a year ago which TheBuzz has not forgotten and never will. Trolls don't steal from trolls! Everybody else, it's totally cool, even encouraged.

In order to regain his good standing amongst the Society, Ramset will need to deliver two stars and special majestic powers to TheBuzz on Grumpy's own silver platter.

Quarktoo was awarded 300 no mercy points for taking down the Grumpula and he is not giving them back. Those stars were hard earned and payback from being banned himself by Grumy's intel gathering operation run by Ramset a year ago.

MrMag
Currently under investigation by the ATS as a spook supporter.

Dave45
Currently under investigation by the ATS as a spook supporter.

LtBolo
Showed up after Grumpy outed himself. Appears to be Herger's handler giving him some support and oversight would be my guess. Class act and fairly nice person. 

Magluvin
Part of the Grumpy Ramset Hartman intel gathering crew.

Grumpy AKA Sigma16 AKA Herger - Captured!
Busted by Quarktoo for expired ATS license and poser math skills. Grumpy tied to use vector mathematics in a relative equation puzzle. Rank amateur and dull corporate tool. Not afraid to troll the muddy waters of overunity.com and overunityresearch.com - Considered dangerous if drinking.

Fond of using alternative 3rd world math he found on a web site, switching the equations around and holding that up as evidence of his intelligence. Easily identified as he alludes to knowing something like IST but does not use 100 smileys per post.

This is IBM's second attempt at developing "William" and has been code named "TrollSoft 2.0" by ATS software engineers that have been working to deactivate it. While Quarktoo did expose him, it was deemed necessary to bring in Saint Buzz  to deactivate this "artificial intelligence" module.

Grumpy's last words were:


"You are correct that I am an "agent" of sorts, gathering intel.  I am quite good at it.  Alphabet soup may not taste good, but it pays well.  Smears are to goad you into spilling the beans, which you don't have.  I have been trying for two year to figure out who clued you in on the energy to mass conversion.  It is obvious that they only gave you the general idea as you do not have the rest of it.  This case in inconclusive but deemed "unimportant".  So, you are "correct", but without the rest of it, you have a long way to go.  In the slim chance that you figured this out on your own: Kudos!

We have info leaks all the time.  It like a big game really.  Let a little out, see what happens.  Mix a little truth with fiction.  All sorts of methods.  The Zionist stuff is by far the funniest yet.  People look for patterns and similarities.  Throw in a little meat and "BAM!" they fill in the blanks as fast as they can.  It's hillarious.  You are, by far, our best tool.  Man! You are like our own "puppet on a string".  Dance Puppet! Dance!

My comments about "no OU" and a "more efficeint means of induction" are absolutely correct.  Anyone biting on that would become and immediate interest.  No one here bit.

Oh, And Chet, we have disclosed the "secrets", just not in a detailed or even compiled form.  It's part of the protocol to see who knows what.

Well, it's been fun gents.,."

RIP Grumpula - You were a worthy opponent.

TinselKoala
This real life psychopath is the reason crazy people should be neutered. Take insecure, mix in some psychotic levels of projection and an obsessive need for attention and you have this mistake of humanity.

Has thus far claimed to be from Australia, New Zealand and now claims to live "10 of miles from the inventor of the magnecoaster" in Ontario Canada. Canadians measure distance in kilometers dumb ass... Just to complete the picture, his youtube account claims he is from the US.

Suspected of having Conflicted Multiple Personality Disorder (CMPD) which has spread across the Earth since the personalities don't get along.

Publicly accused of being all of the four horseman from the apocalypse in a single shape shifting troll by Vatican spokesman Father Ciro Benedettini.

After being crushed by Quarktoo in Lawrence Tseung's temple of trolling, Tinsel went over the edge and is now required to take medication and wear an ankle bracelet monitored by law enforcement for the rest of his life.


ION
Unlicensed troll, confirmed pirahna-maximus. As smooth as Ramset yet possesses small amounts of logic and reason. Works as a honey trapper and cannon loader like Ramset.


MileHigh
Unlicensed troll, small-time poser, confirmed pirahna-maximus. A one trick pony with his "Cry-Harder-Than-Tammy-Fey-Baker" tactic. Will come at you like a pack of gay spider monkeys.


POYNT99
Unlicensed troll, confirmed pirahna-maximus. Suspected UK government tool according to Grumpy - Unbalanced mod at OUR  (OUR stands for OverUnity.com Rejects) POYNT99 was once highly regarded in the troll industry and held several awards prior to his partial gender reassignment surgery.

During last year's annual troll summer picnic, .99 stripped naked and ran through the park screaming "I got to be me" at the top of his lungs. He was stripped of his membership and banished from the American Troll Society. - (Unfortunate choice of words noted.)

POYNT99 was recently interviewed on ATS TV which was awkward, due to the fact that he was naked.

IST
Innovation Station Team - AKA Osiris
This is the most successful unlicensed cyber-troll in interweb history. Code named "William" by programmers at IBM, this is actually just a software program with a defective artificial intelligence module.

Shortly after mounting itself on a free porn site server for 24 hours, IST replicated like a virus and spread across 7 continents. After infecting the computers on the space station, IST is regarded as the first galactic troll in human history.

Unfortunately, copies of the software inherit the defective intelligence module and get smarter with each replication. Recent versions of IST can now differentiate between themselves and others giving IST the intelligence of some bacteria.

We have had many requests to honor IST but we can't justify the expense for what amounts to a defective floppy disk. That being said, IST did make 5000 useless posts at overunity.com before finally being banned. "There is a certain quality that comes from quantity." - Joseph Stallin


the_big_m_in_ok
Post graduate of the Forrest Gump School of Espionage & Trade Craft. He may have accidentally outed himself after posting this link from his web browser instead of a link to a file which whois's to the CIA:

http://172.16.254.163:15871/cgi-bin/blockpage.cgi?ws-session=1644316490

It was not ironic that CompuTutor noticed the error and "tutored" him. Stupid is as stupid does. New user name please!

It appears CompuTutor rolled over and tried to make good in order to avoid being placed on the no fly list.


OmniBus
OmniBus is not a troll, he is just "trollish". Hard working and pure fucking evil, this troll can hold his own with even the ATS professionals.

Naturally born with personality traits you can't teach, this troll is smart, obsessive, uncooperative, antagonistic, neurotic, unpredictable, selfish, humorless, and totally devoid of all human compassion. This heartless bastard is what we teach our students to be.

Inventor of the men's cologne "Bloody Puppy Entrails", (I use it myself and love it!) you can smell OmniBus coming a mile away. Unfortunately he is unlicensed and must be brought into compliance.


Security Notices
WilbyInebriated 
This unlicensed, wanna-be corporate troll is trying to make a name for himself at overunity.com. Considered a lightweight on anything technical or scientific, his pedantic banter is easily crushed by a small children using the ignore button.

It was recently discovered that after 1800 posts, he had made or at least possessed a joule thief
and claimed he had contributed since he was the first to connect it to a fluorescent lamp. I still can laughing because he just became the new MASTER TROLL.

He subsequently made a video warning other trolls about trolling ATS licensed trolls. He appears to have learned his lesson.


While he does possess noteworthy proof-reading skills, he is not worthy of a reward and is not being pursued at this time. WilbyInebriated is suspected of being Grumpy pretending to be a drunken bar slut under yet another user name. That being said, this could actually just be a drunken bar slut or my old buddy Huck.